Tim Brownson, one of my Life Coaching heroes (the first actually) talks about 'reframing'. I use the term 'redescribe' which philosopher, Richard Rorty, used in "Contingency, Irony, and Solidarity." Basically, take every event in you life and give it a narrative - this narrative can have an empowering, disempowering, or neutral effect on you. For example, if someone came from an abusive household they might say that because they came from a dysfunctional family they are doomed to failed relationships and unhappiness. They may blame their parents, siblings, teachers, friends etc for the way their life has gone.
A redescription or reframing of the aforementioned might sound like this: while there were many challenges to overcome and pain to experience, I am not bound to continually punish myself for what happened in the past - I acknowledge there was pain and frustration for us all and let it go. I forgive myself for the choices I have made and forgive others as well.
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